i talked to my mum. i said that i want to go far-east plaza & buy a shirt. & she said no.
wtf! she just said the word "NO", nothing else. that is like so not her. if she says no, she would tell me why. this time, she just says the word 'no'.
oh common, next wednesday is my court date & she wont even give me a little freedom?
i just wish everything was back to the way it was when i could go out & come home late.
this was all thanks to my dumbass dad. i wish he had never came into my mum's life.
i wish he'd die in his sleep tonight. seriously, it will bring joy & happiness into my life if he will die soon. some of you may think im cruel but wait till you step into my shoes & experience how i feel.
he's just my step father. he's not my bloody real blood father. who is he to touch me? i can be myself & fight & hit him back but i was patient. cause i knew i was in the wrong to do what i had done. he said that he had done everything that i had done while he was at my age. if he says that, it means that he should understand what im going through & fucking understand me. & he alway talks about how his parents treated him when he was young. well, times have changed.. that was your generation, this is mine. UP YOURS DAD!!!
i just want to have freedom & go out of the house. cause when im outside, i become myself. i become more open. but when im at home, im not my usual self.
&& im dying to meet qeelia before my court date cause im scared that i'll have to go boys home & i'll miss her birthday which is next month. &&& she told me that she'd be staying in australia for a month soon. yeah, i would miss her but i told her to go & experience the life there. it'd be fun.
*imy & ily, Asyrafizwani!
Labels: i want to be free
